This raising children is a matter for a few, for mom and dad (we can't forget grandparents who always lend a hand). However, it is talking about how to feed our baby and starting to hear unfortunate comments of all kinds. If you don't breastfeed your baby, they will tell you things like 'why don't you breastfeed your child if it is the best for him?' And, if you decide to give it to him until he is 4 years old, they will tell you this other 'are you still breastfeeding him ?, with how old he is!
The point is to comment and comment, yes, without malice, I know, but surely you also know that all those words hurt, annoy and take their toll on those nights when you can't fall asleep. Well, no, Breastfeeding or bottle feeding does not make mothers better or worse, We know it, but here we come to put the blame aside and tell it to those who have not yet found out.
Breastfeeding has a lot of advantages for the mother and the little one, not only because it saves money (formula is expensive) and because it creates bonds between the mother and the little one, but also because it helps prevent future illnesses (especially if breastfeeding extends beyond the first year), reduces infant mortality, helps develop their intellect and a lot more wonderful things.
However, breastfeeding does not make you a better mother and not breastfeeding does not make you a worse mother. Time to clear up these things, don't you think?
Sometimes it is family, other friends, strangers, people who look at you strangely when they see you give your child a bottle in the park ... The fact is that more than one and more than two will tell you How come you don't breastfeed your child with all the good that this entails.
That in certain regions, because Let's not forget that in many others it is frowned upon that a mother takes her breast in public to breastfeed her baby. The point is that it seems that a decision as personal as feeding in the first months of a child's life must be agreed by everyone.
Dad has a lot to say, of course he does, but let me talk about them, about mothers, about ourselves, because we are the ones who must say whether they breastfeed or opt for formula milk. And no, opinions or constructive criticism are not worth it, not even when the mother starts talking about it.
Because a bottle with a lot of love is better than a teat with stress; because sleepless nights take their toll on all of us; because there are times you want and you can't or it is the baby who has his preferences; because work and the current pace of life is not always what we would like; and because each one has a way of understanding things and raising a child and not one has to be better than another. The key? Respect for all and no guilt.
And it is that, as explained in the report Artificial Breastfeeding Guide, prepared by the pediatric service of the Hospital Fundación Jimenez Díaz, Madrid, (Spain), 'there are certain occasions in which, by decision of the mother or by contraindication of breastfeeding, you have to opt for artificial lactation and nothing happens. '
If you decide not to breastfeed, no matter how clear you are, surely you or someone else at some point makes you feel guilty. If you want and you cannot give it to him for whatever reason: the milk does not rise, the baby does not hook ... the guilt seems to multiply by two: 'what a mother I am done', 'it will be that I am not good for this'. And then there are the phrases from the outside: 'have you tried enough?', 'If all mothers can!', 'It usually happens to those with little breasts'. What are typical phrases that, said in what context, can be a time bomb?
There are times when breastfeeding goes beyond two years, wonderful! And there are others in which the baby cries because he is dissatisfied, the scale says that he is not weighing well, night awakenings are a torment, you cannot manage with the breast pump and, sooner than you would like, you are giving your newborn one bottle after another, wonderful too!
What happens is that not feeling guilty or thinking that you are not giving everything for your little one is difficult, right? Doubts and regrets assail you, especially when you are tired and sleepless nights suddenly begin to take a toll on you. No dear mom there is no magic formula for not feeling guilty for not breastfeeding your child, the only thing you can do is trust yourself and repeat this phrase to you every two by three: I am a good mother, the best for my son, no matter how the milk I feed him.
We know very well that not feeling bad or wondering all the time about having opted for formula milk or being uncomfortable breastfeeding when you no longer want to or cannot is not easy. Due to the burden of conscience of each one, we are a generation of mothers and fathers with a clear tendency to feel absolutely guilty about everything, and also because of the opinion that society always insists on shouting from the rooftops.
The mother chooses, the father accompanies, the family supports and the rest are silent. He is silent when he sees a woman giving a bottle to a newborn child, he is silent when he sees a mother who takes her breast when her 4-year-old son says: 'mama, tit' and is silent when the future mother says that maybe do not want to breastfeed the little one in you.
The opinions of each one, the advice and the sayings are counted in order to help and not to do harm, we know, but they do not always achieve that end. Whether you breastfeed or not, you are taking just as good care of your childYou are not doing her any harm and you are not becoming a better or a worse mother.
What does make you an excellent mother is the love you give your child from the first moment you discover that he is inside you, the dedication you give him, the unconditional support, the times you don't say 'I told you so ', the band-aid you put on his knee, the words of encouragement, the times you allow him to make his own mistakes, when you let him go out with his friends, when you advise him on his studies or his job and all those things. that they will never ever fall on deaf ears.
Will there ever come a day when breastfeeding or not breastfeeding is no longer a debate? Let's hope so!
You can read more articles similar to Breastfeeding or bottle feeding a baby does not make mothers better or worse, in the category of On-site Breastfeeding.