Frustration is a feeling that appears in the child when he is not able to satisfy some desire or need. This feeling causes the little one to experience a series of mixed emotions such as being angry, being sad, having anxiety, etc. And not knowing how to deal with them. However, there are certain things that, with a little thought, we can learn from the frustration children sometimes feel.
It seems that in recent times the use of labels such as: bad, rude, capricious, tyrants or aggressive has increased to refer to children. It is the way in which adults refer to children who suffer from a low tolerance for frustration. Most of the time we stay on the labels, but we do not delve into the reason for that behavior of the little ones in which the 'older' have so much to do.
There is a growing number of fathers and mothers who believe 'they cannot take their children'. They feel overwhelmed, without tools to educate them. This insecurity in the parents will be the basis on which the low tolerance to frustration of children is sustained today. A base on which other educational errors are based and that makes it more solid if possible. These are:
- An overly permissive education
Today's parents come, generally, from being educated in authoritarianism. By wanting to break with it, we choose to be democratic with our children, but many times we make the mistake of letting go. In other words, we have gone from one educational extreme to another without knowing how to see the virtues of balance.
- Educational overprotection
It is one of the most common erroneous criteria in the education of children. Excessive parental care is harmful for the little ones. Children's self-esteem will be low, this will make them not self-confident and, therefore, it will be difficult for them to tolerate frustration.
- Do not teach how to wait
As a consequence of being overprotective, children do not learn to delay satisfaction. Consequently, little ones do not learn impulse control and this makes them more prone to frustration.
In this way, the insecurity that is generated in parents when educating their children will be the obstacle to avoid. Doing so will make it much easier to get to the tools necessary to get children to tolerate frustration well.
This feeling that we have of the increase in frustration in children should make us stop to reconsider and understand that it is necessary to use tools that help us educate our children so that they can face the future in a satisfactory way. Thus, it will be necessary to understand as parents that it is important:
1. Be an example
Parents should be the mirror where their children look at themselves and learn to behave. Therefore, parents must act accordingly on how they want their children to be.
2. Be responsible
Today the rights of children are defended tooth and nail. The problem is that people have stopped thinking that these rights have to be accompanied by responsibilities. It will be necessary to teach children that they have rights and must defend them, but it does not exempt them from having responsibilities and that fulfilling them is just as important.
3. Educate in effort
Overprotection must be put aside and the culture of effort restored because, in many cases, the best way to resolve difficulties. It is one of the keys on which we can reflect from the frustration of our children.
4. The importance of setting limits and saying NO
We must know that having limits is not bad, in fact, it is very important to set limits for children. The bad thing will be the excess or the deficiency of it. Limits will give the child security. They mark the way forward. They are the framework that ensures the area in which children can move freely.
5. Be more positive
Adults must learn to look for and find good things in the adverse situations that occur throughout life. It is also important that we teach this attitude to our children. This way of exchanging negative thoughts for positive ideas makes us and the children acquire confidence, security and consequently more happiness.
However, the key to educating children is not to leave parents alone. The impact of society on children today is immense. Our children are influenced by different media, social networks, music, friends, school, etc. Therefore, it will be very important that the same values are transmitted from the different channels. There is a need for all individuals that make up society to row in the same direction to educate 'our future', children.
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